One of the joys of calling Pittsburgh home is that we do not lack for support when it’s needed.
During the holidays, bereavement can be especially tough.
You may wish to contact The Good Grief Center, based in Pittsburgh, for assistance.

The Center creates a safe place where people who have experienced the pain of death can work through their loss and learn to manage their grief. Its free services include peer support, group support and family bereavement programs. Since 2001, the Center has assisted more than 20,000 people with these programs.

Monthly support groups, including one for daughters who have lost mothers,
meet at  2717 Murray Ave., Squirrel Hill.

Don’t overchedule yourself. Grieving is hard work. Give yourself space during the holidays, whether you are grieving a recent loss or one that is not considered by others to be recent. Care for yourself with vigilance and don't overcommit your time.

Talk it out with family and friends. Communicate with your family and friends about how you are feeling. If an event or activity seems like it will be too much to bear, say so. If you need to try something different or avoid a tradition altogether this year, speak up. You do have choices and those who care about you will support your feelings.

Go easy on yourself. Allow time to grieve and don’t put a timeline on the process. We need to remind ourselves that the healing process cannot be rushed; it will proceed at its own rate. The holiday season will most likely evoke emotions that are more intense than others. Being prepared for that possibility will help.

Try making a journal. If you are feeling particularly down, consider writing a letter or journal entry to your loved one. Say what you would tell her as if she were here right now. Even if you never share the letter with anyone, writing it may help you work through your grief.

Eat and sleep well. Exercise without pressure. Grief work is exhausting physically, mentally, and emotionally. Take care of yourself by getting enough rest, eating nourishing food, and giving yourself breaks from your grief work. Exercise in a way that is relaxing for you.

If it helps you, pray. If you have any religious inclination, consider contacting your place of worship. All religions recognize that those who are mourning need support and may be of assistance in lending encouragement. Consider taking advantage of religious services even if you have not been attending regularly. You will not be turned away.

If you are comfortable, share your pain with others. Consider seeking out others who are mourning. The Good Grief Center has a number of bereavement support groups onsite and a comprehensive listing of support groups throughout the region. Give us a call and we can help find one that’s right for you. These groups provide a safe setting and compassionate support. Many individuals find comfort sharing in a group setting.

Be open minded. If you feel stuck in your mourning process, try a new approach. Humans are creatures of habit who learn very quickly how to avoid painful situations. However, this can hinder working through your grief. To “jump start” the process, consider reviewing photos, home movies, or videos. Talk about your loved one, if you can.

Create your own memorial service. Celebrate the accomplishments and values your loved one cherished. Consider carrying the torch of a cause she believed in as a memorial. Start a scholarship fund, plant a garden, or make a donation in her name to her favorite charity.

Be patient. The grieving process often includes setbacks. Don’t expect to set an “I’ll be over it” deadline and succeed. The goal is NOT to ‘get over’‘ but to ‘get through’ – you will get through this! Holidays trigger a flood of emotions. Don’t be surprised by this and don't consider it a sign of weakness.